What You're Telling Your Team When You Allow a Jerk to be a Jerk
Sometimes all the different personalities and communication styles within a team can be challenging to work with. High-functioning teams recognize each person’s strengths and weaknesses and feel safe speaking up and holding each other accountable when conflicts arise. They don’t tolerate toxic behavior. They have great leaders who role model those behaviors and address issues before they explode and impact morale.
Unfortunately, not every leader has the awareness or insight to deal with negative or toxic behavior, and their team suffers as a result.
This is WHAT YOU’RE TELLING YOUR TEAM WHEN YOU ALLOW A JERK TO BE A JERK:
I fully support how the jerk is acting
I’m not strong enough to have a tough conversation with the jerk
I’m okay if my good people leave because of the jerk (the real reason they leave is because the leader wouldn’t deal with the jerk)
I care more about my own comfort than how my team feels
The jerk’s technical skills are more important than the mental health of other team members
I’m unaware of how my inaction impacts employees
I don’t care about helping the jerk develop or grow to be better
One toxic person has an enormous impact on the well-being and productivity of a team. This is where compassionate leadership plays an important role.
When a leader has the strength to address toxic behaviors with an employee, it shows compassion to the other team members, as well as that person. Part of the leader’s role is to protect the values and wellbeing of the entire team, which potentially includes helping a person grow through a tough phase in life.
A leader needs to deal with these issues quickly. Either the person with jerky behavior works through what’s going on in their lives and makes an effort with the team, or an alternate solution needs to be discussed. Other options may include working as an individual contributor, moving to another department, or deciding they just aren’t a fit for your company.
Inaction will kill the spirit of a team but working through hard things will bring them closer together.